Saturday, August 27, 2011

magic boobs

My partner thinks I have magic boobs.

Ok, I agree with him most of the time. I have these two things on my body that manufacture milk that is the sole nourishment of my baby. How cool is that?

What annoys me is when my magic boobs are supposed to cure everything. I can't tell you how many times I've heard this: Just put her on your boob and then she'll feel better/ fall asleep/ stop being crabby/ etc.


Frustrating. Why? Because it doesn't always work. Just because I "put her on my boob" doesn't mean she'll fall asleep. Just because I "put her on my boob" doesn't mean that she'll instantly be happy. Sometimes she just doesn't want to eat! What do I do then? Wave my magic boob in her face and mutter abracadabra?!?

I've realized this is his way to get out of all sorts of undesirable baby situations. Baby crying? Well, I can't fix it because I don't have boobs. Here- you take her. You have the magic boobs. Frustrating, annoying, and sometimes fight-worthy. How I wish that he could breastfeed, so I could do the same thing to him. He doesn't understand how I feel, or at least, he claims not to (when convenient).

If only I did have magic boobs. I'd wave them around, shooting glitter out of them a la Sleeping Beauty. Granting wishes for babies far and wide. Spreading calm and happiness across the land.

No, I just have regular boobs. Not magic, but pretty special and amazing anyways.

4 comments:

  1. I like your blog & I'm now following you! Happy Weekend hop! I hope you check out my blog at:
    http://mamiholisticaygenial.blogspot.com/
    Namaste!

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  2. OMG too funny but it is true. I did BF but not allot because I was not producing enough. But it is true y the end of my BF I was squeezing milk everywhere. Thank you for visiting my blog I am now a new follower. Happy Sunday

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  3. Oh how true!!! So many people think we are magic. Gotta love it. :) Next time I nurse, all I am going to be able to think about is shooting glitter out of my boobs. <3

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  4. My husband does the same thing!! He'll be holding/playing with the baby and he'll get fussy, immediately DH says "Is he hungry?" I'm always like, didn't you JUST see me feeding him before you took him three minutes ago?! No, he's not hungry! hahahaha When he was a newborn, I think it was just an easy excuse to get out of crying baby duty, but now that he's older, I can for sure say that he does not want to nurse three minutes after he just finished! :P

    ReplyDelete

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